Reviews of eHarmony

After having tried Yahoo Personals and Match.Com with some success, I decided to give E-Harmony a chance, after ll they would save me picking the wrong man again, right?? Luckily I got a deal, 3 months for the price of 1! What a farce! First off, it took approximately a week to get my pictures posted, not because I am inept, but because of glitches in their system. By then my 7 Day trial that could result in a refund was up!

In 3 months, I received 5 matches from them. I initiated communication with all of them. One ended it because he was dating someone else. I ended one because we definitely were not a match (his idea of how to spend his free time was at Big Lots!). Two never communicated at all, and the last was pictureless, and the majority of responses were N/A. He also never responded.

I communicated my problems with customer service. They told me that I needed to give it time. I think in 3 months I should have at least gotten to the stage of free communication with one person! Yet a man I know said he got 5 or 6 matches a day! What the heck is going on here?

I am a Christian, but once again I shudder to see how this affects how non Christians view us. This seems to be a total scam!

I might have something to say about this site if it had let me in. But after I took the psychological profile assessment, it said that it can't actually help about 20 percent of the users who come to it, and evidently I'm part of that 20 percent. Well, dandy.

eHarmony Sucks! It's new name to me is eHarm-a-me.

I am a 36 year old, intelligent woman. My advice - stick to match, yahoo, etc. I have spent a little over a month on eH and have had it - I'm done. btw, if you hold out on signing up, they will offer you 3 months for $45, but I still do not recommend it!!!

Biggest points: their questionaire is a psychological assessment not a match making tool, and the web application is not friendly to use. Below details what SUCKS about eHarm-a-me.

1) You have no control over the criteria that makes a match after the questionaire is filled out. BTW, this questionaire is the same one that empoyers have been using for years to weed out potential bad employees!!! It is not a matching tool, but a PSYCHOLOGICAL profile. It asks the same question over and over in different ways. It is meant detect serious social and inter-personal behavioral problems, i.e. if you are severly bitter, you will not be able to continue. Well, thank you there... but it is not meant to be used to create companion matches. But it will weed out the psychos : ) Good grief.

2) There are no pictures displayed in the match list. There is just a name displayed, many of which are the same. It is time consuming to click into their profile just to see whose status you are looking at. Also, the basic information given is basically worthless, see 3.

3) The basic information listed is name, location, occupation, hight, age, and ethnicity along with Introductory Information. Nothing personal! The intro info is basically a waste of time to read, strengths, what passionate about, blah, blah, blah - they are canned phrases from eH's assessment. Do NOT expect to learn anything significant about the person, there is no personal message of any kind.

4) You then go through a bunch of back and forth canned correspondence as must-haves and can't-stands. By the time you get to actually open email, you have learned almost nothing but 3 answers to free text messages.

5) The open emailing sucks! You cannot see what a match wrote and what you are writing at the same time, if you click back, you loose your message (need to copy first). Rediculous.

6) So you are finally open emailing in a system that bites the big one. - You still hardly know anything about this person and meanwhile, you have been innundated with a crap-load of new introductions (~2 weeks have probably passed).

7) These new introductions are chosen by the system! You have no control beyond mileage scope and a limited set of items, see 1.

So there you have it. It is a huge waste of time for most people. Please stick to more conventional sites, peruse pictures and personal comments, email at will and enjoy!

Best regards to all and good luck!!! ~Jessica

Rating should be less than 1 star. eHarmony = eScam. After forking over $250 for a six-month membership, I was matched with men who were geographically inappropriate (60 miles away!), as well as socially incompatible--I'm an urbanite they were suburbanites; I'm socially and politicall liberal, they were way right of right; etc. I won't even get into the age differences. Throughout the six months I would provide feedback to their customer service staff (who work the standard 9am to 5pm work day, M thru F!) on the absurdly inappropriate matches, but they would send more of the same. At about month four I stopped being annoyed, and allowed myself to be entertained by the horrific quality of eHarmony's 29-dimension matchiing. I wish 60 Minutes would do an indepth story on the inner workings of eHarmony and their bogus 29-dimensions. eDaters beware!

I am in my fourth month with Eharmony. I did research before joining so I knew the drawbacks of signing up for this '29 dimensions' nonsense. So far I have receive almost 200 matches, 75% of which have shut my profile down. I have gotten to the final stage of communication with three matches, and gotten as far as a second date with one.

I find it judgemental that matches can't even attempt to get past initial communication before they shut down your profile. You have to at least go through the multiple choice and open ended question/answer portion of the communication before you have enough information to close a profile down. Otherwise you are doing yourself a disservice and will NEVER find a mate on this website.

If I based my decision to close down a match solely on their profile I would close 90% of them. Based on the matches I have received, not enough effort is put into completing the profile. I spent time refining and wordsmithing my profile to better market myself to potential matches.

The profile needs to be approached like you do a resume. And if I get one more match that lists Ronald Reagan as their personal hero or that has read The Davinci Code I will scream! And guys, if the only picture you have is you dressed as a pirate, DON'T post it. I know, I know. I complained about passing judgement but come on, I just can't date a pirate.

Eharmony has added a new feature to their website. If a match closes down your profile, you now have the option of sending them a 'Final Message' in response. Eharmony provides 5 standardized messages, none of which really satisfy your instinct to tell the other person what an idiot they are to pass you up! I am not interested in sending a final message to someone who closes my profile. I am not going to beg someone to reconsider.

I have a couple more days before it is too late to cancel my membership. I didn't want to battle all the freaks on match.com but I think I am ready to take my chances.

Having read a number of reviews about eharmony.com I noticed that many of the people didn't give eharmony very much time before they cancelled. Well I bought into their "give eharmony 12 months" pitch and here is my experience.

First the stats. In 12 months I actually got to the point of dating two women. The first of which turned out to be so much my opposite that you couldn't have picked two people that were so far apart mentally. So even though we gave it a try, ultimately our complete opposite way of looking at things dooms us. The second was actually a pretty good match mentally and interest wise, but physically it was kind of like, well, Lyle Lovett and Julia Roberts, and yes, I was the Lyle character. So after a couple of months, well, you get the picture (lonely tears in the rice crispies).

Overall it was a bad experience. I don't recall how many matches I was sent (not a lot, but not a little), but the majority had no photo, which was an immediate closure. Actually in the beginning I use to ask the person to post a photo, but that was kind of cruel if it turned out you were not attracted to the person because it would be quite obvious that you rejected them soley on their appearance. Most would never even respond anyway.

Now, of all the matches that I did receive, like I said, had no photo, the ones that did have photos usually were so far away as to make a relationship unfeasible. Many of the rest were simple bad matches. And like I said, I ended up seeing two, IN 12 MONTHS. After my membership expired I started to understand why so many "matches" that I had responded to went unanswered. After my membership had expired eharmony was still senting me matches and some of these women were trying to solicit a correspondence with me, of which I could not respond because I wasn't paying. I realized that this was part of their ploy to exploit our lonely hearts into spending $50 more for one more month in the hope that this one was the one. I found this to be deplorable. Not to metion the person trying to meet you thinking that you are simply rejecting them when in reality you are not able to respond. I would not recommend eharmony.com. The price is high and the service is horrid. The whole experience brought my self-worth to an all time low, something I am still recovering from. Lets make a club, "eharmonys anonymous", a 12 step program. :)

In my opinion, e-harmony has two major flaws. First- they won’t explain their logic for making the matches they make. I want to know why I am a match with this person- and why this person is different than 99% of other men.

Second- they force their matches, and focus exclusively on potential emotional compatibility, without any regard to other types of compatibility. For example, they completely discount physical compatibility, and seem to be philosophically opposed to ever choosing a mate on the basis of physical attraction. According to them, this type of mate selection causes relationship problems.

Ok- well, the solution to that isn’t to force people together that are not even remotely attracted to one another. When you get a match, and it comes with a picture of a guy (or girl) you don’t have the slightest attraction to, what are choices? First, close the match immediately with an excuse to try to spare the feelings of the match you’ve closed. (It doesn’t work, of course. They know why you’ve closed them). Second, feel guilty. Feel obligated to “try”, and trust Dr. Warren that if I just give the person a try, I will be happy. What can end up happening is you develop a strong friendship with a person you could never even imagine taking off your clothes with. People just end up feeling very hurt and frustrated. Ignoring and rationalizing away the physical component of a good match isn’t the answer.

In the same vein as physical attraction, intellectual compatibility is also a major factor in match-making they completely overlook. If my IQ is 145, I will never be happy with a man whose IQ is 100. Never. It just doesn’t work. You have to be on the same wavelength. If I have a PhD, and you match me with a welder, and then tell me, “Stop being so high and mighty and stuck up. Why do you think he’s not good enough for you?” you are missing the point. I don’t think I’m better than a welder. I simply do not want a life partner who doesn’t see the world the way that I do.

They claim to take these issues into account, but they don’t. They ask people to self-report their physical attractiveness and intelligence. They’d do better to try to pin down where people are on those dimensions a little more objectively. There truly is someone for everyone, and that welder may be ecstatically happy with a girl who works at Wal-Mart. Just don’t match him with me.

eHarmony SUCKS!!!!!

I found my fiance on Match.com and wasted $300 on eHarmony.

It seemed no better (possible less) than any other service. Match was far less expensive and just as a good if not better.

They have a 7 day refund policy which is worthless, because you spend 7 days just browsing and chatting.

They would not refund my money and I would sue them if it wasn't a waste of my time. I WILL NEVER RECOMMEND eHARMONY TO ANYONE and would encourage them to use Match.com instead. Far better results and they show you people that actually live in your own city.

Not a great service if you ask me when compared to Match.com.

There is just something about the whole process that doesn’t seem right; using a computer algorithm to send me potential matches. Remember, you cannot search a database of potential matches based on criteria. You cannot strike up a conversation on the spot. You really can’t do much of anything before you go through a long laborious process or requesting the 'next step'. I only gave it a few days so I can could get the refund (I now have to call a 1-800 number to confirm I want to leave; I assume this will be a sales pitch).

Overall, I don’t recommend wasting an hour of your time answering 100s of questions and hoping for a computer to do its best. People have to active in the process.

I have been with eHarmony now for 1 month, I only did it for 1 month and that is all I am going to do. I have been getting a lot of matches but Most of them are On the West coast I live on the East Coast.or the matches are just to uncompatible. Also when you do get matches you have to go back and forth with these stupid questions. Most people don't have pictures and there are many steps to go through before you can start talking with that person. I fell that the price is way to high for what you get yes the personality profile is free but you can't start getting matches until you subscribe. Don't waste your money. There are many services that are free and if you want to pay the price to upgrade on these other sites the price is much lower then eharmony.