Reviews of Match.com

This is not so much a review but a few pointers for men:

Always check for 'Newest Profiles' first. Reason being that attractive women will be deluged by emails from men. If you're going to email her; it's better to be in that first wave that she's more likely to read. The attractive girls quickly develop an over inflated ego and they become addicted to the attention. To summarize: The longer an attractive girl is on Match, the less serious she is going to take you.

Avoid the girls with the 'My Space' glamor shots. You know the self-portraits of them looking sexy into the camera while they stand in the bathroom. Why? Because simply, they're attention whores of the worst kind. Because the meat market design of Match only makes attention whores worse. Look for the women who have photos of themselves taken by someone else.

Younger women are easier than older. Ok so that's pretty vague but from my experience you'll get further on a date with a younger girl than you will with an older. Once girls reach their late 20's and into their 30's they're looking for a man to marry. Even if they say otherwise; it's their clock ticking. For this reason they are very picky. Older women just have too many tests for you to take for them to be much fun.

Finally expect to date below your standards. I view online dating as more of a way for men who have been out of the scene for awhile to get reacquainted with things. That means don't strive to meet the right girl online but view it as practice for when you do meet the right one in real life.

A lot of guys are complaining about poor e-mailing results on these sites. I did a bit of "research" and discovered some of the reasons. First of all, the male to female ration is totally skewed in the women's favor. The sites will never tell you, but it's about 5-10 men for every woman. Second, and most important, only PAYING members can read and respond to e-mail (while anyone can post a profile for free). The percentage of paying members is 3-5%. That's it. And most of them are guys. If you send out 100 e-mails and winks, only 3-5 of the women will even be able to read your e-mail, let alone respond. The rest are not paying members, and are waiting for paying members to IM them. The ratio of men to good looking women is more like 50-100 to 1. Women who have good photos receive hundreds of e-mails a week. They won't even read most of them. They scan for the good photos of the guy, and his income, because the choice is seemingly so huge. In real life, the choice is NEVER this wide, so the net gives a false impression that you literally have thousnads of men to choose from. The net favors people who are not necessarily good looking but PHOTOGENIC. Their pics are often much better looking then they are. Anyone who's seen male and female models in real life knows that most of them look plain, nothing special in person. They look good on camera. Somebody's profile cannot give you any impression of what they're like in real life. All these profiles are designed like ad brochures, best foot forward. The success rates on net dating are EXTREMELY low. I went out with a bunch of women with whom I had nothing in common, and I wasn't particularly attracted to. Also, the sites are full of trolling perverts, especially old geezers who are trying to date yonger women. So the women often get crude, offensive e-mails from douche bags who would never approach them in real life. Women then begin to believe that all men on these sites are scum looking for easy sex with braindead bimbos. If she has a bad date with some guy off the site, and he wrote in his profile that he liked camping, and you write in your profile that you like camping, she assumes that you're just like him. Internet dating is mostly a scam designed to take advantage of lonely people.

When are we all going to stop blaming the member of the opposite sex (to some degree) and see that there may be antisocials, the highly confused, players, mentally ill individuals (without judgment on the latter) on the side of each fence, who find the online scene (whether conscious or unconscious) to be the playing ground for their dysfunction. Let's all wake up together and realize that what we end up being attracted to (or even what we are seeking) is not what is necessarily best for us. (That's another psych forum, for another day). Regardless, this forum should not be designed for gender bashing. It should be against the dubious practices of online dating services, which prey upon our legitimate desire to find someone with whom we can connect and find an intellectal/psychological/emotional/physical connection. Everyone, let's come together and get it together, and focus on what's really at hand, if there's really anything at hand at all except the fact that since we're here, we might try to avoid online dating or entertain the scene with great caution. Cheers and best wishes to all. : )

It was sure an eye opener to find this website, and good in a sense, to see others in the same boat. I recently moved to a new city, and not knowing anyone, decided to try out a match.com membership. I was rather astonished at how poor my results were. While I dont have movie star looks, I am reasonable looking, work out religiously (I probably have a better body than 90+% of these bitches, not to mention smarter), have a good job and live in a high rise apartment with an great view. I thought it would be a good way to meet a lot of women and increase my odds over the usual methods. I thought at the least it would lead to some casual meetings even if they didnt lead to anything. After sending out dozens of winks and emails (yes I know now that winks are a waste now but I also will not spend any more of my valuable time crafting emails which wont even be acknowledged), I ended up with only a handful of winks in response, which after I replied with emails, got no response. Well not quite. I did get a long email from a beautiful Russian lady (yeah right) whose profile disappeared shortly afterward, and a few other psychos or spammers. I began to have a lot of self doubt, am I really that awful? I look around and other guys dont seem that great. I am only 5'8" though, I guess thats the killer, and not a multi-millionaire either LOL. I began to wonder if women are just more picky as they get older (I'm in my 30s) or what. I dated some good looking girls when I was younger and even used to talk and meet up with women I met online from AOL back in the 90s. Yahoo and the other online sites is just the same crap. I also changed my height to 6'2" and income 150,000+ (I had no response listed originally) and shot out several hundred winks, which helped a little bit but it was still an awful percentage. Even a lot of the dogs wouldnt respond, girls I wouldnt fathom dating in real life! So whats going on here? The hotties get overwhelmed with email and because they have so much choice, never settle for anyone, they will just keep looking for months for Mr. Nonexistent. As a result, the guys get frustrated and out of desperation lower their standards and start contacting lower tiered girls, and even ugly ones to see if they will get any kind of response. Which explains why the ugly ones wonder why a guy will contact them but not follow it up; answer: because it was random, a test, or out of frustration. So as a result, nobody wins (except only an extremely low % of the guys who were picked by the trophy girls. What does this do to dating in general? Instead of making it easier, it paradoxically makes it worse, since this just gives women an outlet to be more picky (since they are contacted much more by email than approached in everyday life). It is the same effect that the internet has had on finding a job; if a job is posted online, there will be hundreds of responses to it, as a result it becomes harder for both sides to make a match. Luckily, the % of women that use internet dating is still somewhat small, and the best way to meet women is still the old-fashioned way.

I would like to take this opportunity to commend Truth Serum for his July 11, 2006 commentary. His 16 reasons why women have the problem "Why can't I find a nice guy" are right on target. Congratulations for saying what all men have been thinking. Ladies, listen up....one or more of these points apply to you. This list should be required reading for females planning to post profiles on any dating website (if they are serious about finding a guy). Allow me to add an additional reason why you "can't find a nice guy". It is that your acceptable target age range is too narrow, particularly with regard to men your senior. It is well documented that males (of any species) are hard-wired to seek out the most nubile, the most fecund (read: "young") females available. This is true from insects to humans, from African tribes to Boston bluebloods, from cave men to today's men. Check your anthropology and zoology textbooks. No extensive list of your accomplishments (Harvard PhD, 150 IQ, testimonials from friends about how "sweet" you are, etc) can overcome nature's program. Men can't (and don't have to) justify it. Let's just say that, for example, the often listed (inane) quality in women's profiles "I love to laugh" is NOT the thing that attracts men and has resulted in the six billion people on this earth. But nature is. Therefore, if you are (pick an age) a 40 year old female, for example, the "pool" of available marriage minded male candidates who are your age or younger who would be interested in you (for a wedding) is incredibly small. Particularly after you exclude the marrieds, the gays, and the others with deal-killer attributes. Sure, we can all name a few women that have married younger men (primarily actresses). So what? A few people win the Powerball lottery. Does that make it an intelligent game to play? Do you want to wake up (alone)at (pick an age) and realize that you did NOT find the "needle in the haystack" and have only regrets about having rejected otherwise qualified candidates that were well north of you in age? Not a pleasant way to spend your spinsterhood. You might be (unpleasantly) surprised to know what the statistics say about your marriage chances at your present age. These numbers are for the odds of you EVER being married during the rest of your life (you don't even want to know what your chances are in the next 12 months). I haven't made up these statistics; they come from "The Woman's Almanac and Book of Facts" (page 17) "Age" and "Percent of Women Who Will Ever Marry": 25 - 78.5% 30 - 55.3% 35 - 34.3% 40 - 20.2% 45 - 11.3% 50 - 6.1% 55 - forget it. Some of you may think "But I have YEARS before I have to worry about this". Wrong. I assure you that you will be there in the blink of an eye. Want to wait until you are, say, 40? Four out of 5 unmarried forty year old women will never tie the knot. Do you want to be in that group? Ladies, I am NOT criticizing women "of a certain age". Many of you are very appealing. And I am not suggesting that you welcome liars, cheaters, or assorted miscreants. I am only trying to encourage you to direct your search to the catagory of males that WILL find you the most attractive, viz: men somewhat older than you. It's all about targeting to a receptive market. In my own case I know that (most) women prefer guys taller than they are. That's okay, I'm average height but I don't piss and moan about how unfair that is. Instead I concentrate on petite women that find my height satisfactory and have had good results. In your case I suggest you ignore the younger dudes that want a very young babe and focus instead on the guys your senior who DO want you. My counsel is to significantly expand your target age range northward and watch your pool of quality "nice guys" increase commensurately. What they lack in youth (so do you, actually) the older guys may more than compensate for with stability, maturity, and desire to commit. You won't like all of them, but you will like some of them. Good luck.

Okay, I know I just posted a review, but I have to stick up for the ladies and respond to "Wise Man." First of all, what many men often fail to realize is that these sites are LOADED with AVERAGE women who are dying for someone to talk to them. Here’s a newsflash for some of you all: maybe you should take a look in the mirror and realize that you’re trying to contact women out of your league. Don’t complain, piss, and moan when the only women you contact are the top 2%. I can do that, but guess what? I'm above average. Sorry, sounds cocky as hell, but it's the truth. My response ratio is like 1:3, and I email the top 2%. Yet, I don't complain when I don't get a response from one of these women, being that I reject many AVERAGE women a day. It goes both ways, and it's hypocritical for you cry when the only women you're contacting are women out of your league. And please, spare me the "fat" stuff...many of you have beer guts, so you have no right to call anyone else "fat."

Yet, many guys--for whatever reason--seem to forget this; they forget what their "league" is once they join an OD site; then they piss and moan like "Wise [Bitter Old] Man" when some twenty three year old, blonde, tanned coed doesn't return a wink. Listen clearly, "Wise [Bitter Old] Man"---young women don't want old farts like you. I don't care how many speed boats, degrees from Harvard, and butlers you have: they don't want you. When you were young, were you looking to date Granny? Why in the hell do you think it's any different for women? Also, there are plenty of women your OWN age on these sites, and these women are in your league, so you're being a hypocrite by complaining that you can't land some trophy GF when there are plenty of women your OWN age on these sites just dying to meet someone.

Leave the young ones for guys like me, okay? You see, I'm above average and I know my league. You obviously don't.

Not so much a review, but a warning to other gullible morons like myself. I joined match to meet an asian woman and concentrated on the philippines. I've only been a member a month and have gotten directly or indirectly asked to send money from 3 out of 4 women i corresponded with. I was able to dismiss the first two. However, I fell BIGTIME for one of the scams. I'm embarrassed to say how much I got taken for, but it was more than a couple of hundred. The scam was professional and very good. I normally take pride in being a hardened new yawker and immune to such things. But I had my blinders on and, like I said, this was a well thought out scam. I just reported it to match - I'm curious to see how they handle it. I know there's little they can do, but I wanna see if they do anything. Anyway, just a warning -- lock your wallet away when you stop thinking with your brain. [i also reported it to the FBI.]

Single moms should only date divorced dads? Sorry, Truth Serum, but you're way off on that one. I'm a single mom and I've never "had" to date a divorced dad, not to say I wouldn't, just haven't come across one I'd want. The men I have dated, (some who were younger) were great guys who had no problem with my being divorced with children. They weren't desperate losers who didn't have any other choice, either. They're attractive, smart, successful men and I'm still friends with most of them. With some the problem was they want to be married and I don't. Sorry to burst your bubble. You know, you're telling us we're too narrow on our search by wanting only single, younger men, but aren't you doing the same thing by saying you'd never marry a woman who is divorced with children? There are plenty of beautiful single moms who just married too young or too quickly the first time and would make wonderful wives. Marriages don't end because someone had kids going into the marriage, but because the husband and wife have differences that they can't work out. Mothers know how to give and receive love unselfishly. Sounds like you could use some love yourself.

OK, I read Wiseman's review and felt I have to chime in from a male point of view. Although the human race is far from perfect, we always by nature want what we cannot have or easily obtain. True, it is much harder for a guy on Match given that women will get lots of emails and can be choosy. Also, what really pisses me off about Match is this crap of not knowing who is a paid member or not. I was a member last year and spent hours typing well crafted emails and come to find out they may or may not have been read. The $5 feature of has it been read was not available at the time. IMHO this is blatant fraud and should warrant FTC intervention. But back to my original point, this business of age. Call me crazy but I truly prefer to date women my own age (40) and up. If they are younger, realistically 35 is my cutoff. I think Wiseman is missing the point of a woman not having a pool of candidates to choose that are marriage oriented. I happened to meet an incredible woman a few weeks ago (42 in case you're wondering) and although it's too soon to say she's the one, there is hope. Statistics are just that - a bunch of numbers chosen from a random sample that CANNOT be truly representative of the population. So instead of having this sense of bitterness, you need to take the necessary steps to change. I've had my dry spells of being alone and although staying optimistic was challenging a lot of the time, it seems to have paid off. I also take refuge in my gym and that my friend is just desserts. Lots of guys let themselves go later in life but I refuse to go peacefully. BTW - I'm 6'6", 260 and can bench nearly 400 and run several miles a day. So bottom line is smile at everyone who is not a felon, lose the attitude towards women and maybe your luck will change. I know mine did.

Hey Wise Man, sounds like somebody's been rejected by a bunch of women way younger than you, so you're trotting out stats that prove how sorry they're going to be. Those statistics concern *first* marriages. Women, don't fall for the tripe men like this spout. To quote an episode of "Sex in the City": Snow White woke up, got a career with medical benefits and started a family via in vitro fertilization.

The same 40-year old guy that wants a woman 15 years younger will dump her when he reaches age 50 in hopes of finding another younger woman. Snow White may buy it. The rest of us are looking for a man that has matured beyond the college frat, and his age has little to do with qualities that make for a great, long-lasting relationship.