Reviews of Match.com

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Reviewed By been there los angeles

Sex Female

Rating **

Date August 24, 2007

Visit Match.com I am a 40 yo asian woman with a reasonably attractive face and fantastic body, cool personality (really- not wild, not mousy just a cool open minded wholesome normal girl), post-doc education and six figure income who has no kids or substance abuse problem. I would say match isn't that great but it's better than any of the other one I tried namely eharmony. And even on match, I don't get that many great men. 9/10 men who write either look awful, don't have as much education, have too many children or too much extra weight. I wonder is it b/c of my age, my ethnicity, or what. Now I have a free membership on chemistry.com which is a offshoot of match. it doesn't hurt.

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Try having realistic expectations. It's no wonder a successful attractive woman like yourself is alone. There is one sentence in your review that seems to speak volumes about your attitude. Sheesh! And lonely middle aged people wonder why they are destined to spend their lives alone or be unhappy or both? Is it any wonder there are so many unhappy people in this country?

This is more of a commentary as opposed to an actual review of Match.com. I was on Match.com for about a month in April 2007 and realized that during that time, the normal everyday women that I'd like to date are mixed in with a bunch of other women who are unsure as to whether they want a relationship, date or settle down. I wouldn't have the time to sift through hundreds of women to find the ones who are actually serious about meeting, even if for one simple date.

Having said that, I have read some of the recent reviews and wished that I could have met some of the reviewers because "you" seem like someone I would have loved to get to know better. Of particular note, Samantha (from USA) dated 8/31/07 wrote an eloquent and very honest review. Then, Karen (from Central Florida) dated 8/30/07 wrote another excellent review where she made an excellent point about women which is.....that "women" cannot be another version of men and thus would naturally share different interests. I think that is an important point lost on a lot of men.

Two other reviews of final note that I thought was well written and made good points was from Kris (from South Florida) dated 8/29/07 and Kate (from Vancouver) dated 8/26/07.

Regardless, offline or online, I wish people luck in meeting that special someone......hopefully for all of us...sooner than later.

Samantha, judge slowly. I am college educated and have a MBA and I could care less what the education status is of the Women I am interested in. I worked in all kinds of jobs from my teens and into my 40's. I have played in Bar bands, done Landscaping, Construction, and the usual office jobs and owned my own business. I have met many people in my travels that have High School educations but they had a great sense of themselves and could adapt in any situation they were put in due to life experience. I have also met people with full degrees that couldn't relate to anyone if they tried. Don't say you are dating out of your league because quite frankly, you very well could be out of theirs in a good way.

I am a fairly attractive, slim woman in my late 30's with only one child who is 17. I have been on match as well as other sites for awhile and have met several nice people although never found that special person as of yet. I can understand when I date out of my league (I only went to highschool and have a low paying job) so of course the college educated professional man isn't going to want me no matter how much we have in common when it comes to religion, politics, values, hobbies. The same men that say a women shouldn't be concerned about how much a man makes are the same men that won't date me because I don't make a big amount of money. Are these men golddiggers? It sure sounds like it. I have recently be talking to a couple of guys who are more in my league. How ever they have rejected me too. O.K why am I not good enough for a 50+ man who is divorced with 7 children under 18? I am not really looking for a man with that much baggage but I wanted to be open minded and not judge as everyone is telling me to do. The guy is behind on bills, losing his home, has a herd of kids whom he can only see supervised (makes me wonder) and his has suddenly stopped writing and calling. He is bitter towards his exwife whom left him for a rich man , but doesn't she deserve better than him? The woman had 7 kids by the time she was 34 (yes she is MUCH younger than him) and still worked full time.

I am looking for a man with good morals but it seems there are two kinds of men on Match, Agnostic immoral men who are looking to use me or Moral religious men who are beyond fanatical and have no interests besides going to church and praying. I have given up on Match and all internet dating as the men are losers or have huge egos.

I have read with great interest many of the reviews here. I find myself agreeing with many of the points my sisters have posted and ironically, quite a few of the posts by you guys. As a widowed Baby Boomer, who is reasonably attractive, educated and self supporting, I would like to add my $.02.

1. I don't "get" winks. I just do not understand the purpose. I have responded to these winks with short, friendly responses to get nothing. If you are not interested, that's fine. But why wink? Am I missing something here?

2. I hope we can all agree that the puffing up on these profiles is done by both men and women. I don't bother lying or posting old pictures because if somebody isn't interested in the real me it won't work anyway. But it is clear that not everybody shares this opinion. You would be amazed by the times that I have shown up to find the man about ten years older than he represented. Men who describe themselves as "about average" can be 50-60 lbs overweight. One man said he went to the gym 5x a week. I am fairly certain the last time he went to the gym was when he joined. I am not looking for a perfect physical specimen so please don't misrepresent.

3. The money thing. I do not need a rich man to take care of me. But I also need to be absolutely sure that he can take care of himself and his own obligations. I don't think that is unreasonable. Men, you should be able to expect the same. You are not a meal ticket and either am I.

4. I must take exception to the man who wrote that normal weight for a woman of 5'5" is 120 lbs. Sorry. While that is within the normal range it is at the low end and few adult women are going to fit into this. But this attitude shows how the disconnect between expectations happens. A woman who is 5'5" and 140 describes herself as "about average". And she is. If the man believes that the low end of normal is about average, we did not have a meeting of the minds.

5. I do not agree to meet anybody unless I have an inkling that we might be compatible for the long term. I also do not make dates and not show up or cancel at the last minute. If I make the date, I am interested. If I don't....

6. I refuse to believe some of the men who have been on here bragging about their conquests. It is not logical to me that women are falling all over themselves in large numbers to hop in bed based on some guy's profile and lines. Occassionally, maybe. In large numbers, doubt it. Especially when it flys in the face of the majority of experiences that the men seem to be having. Sorry, just don't believe it. I believe that most people just want to meet somebody to love and who loves them. Maybe I am wrong.

7. I get a decent number of winks and emails, considering my age. But I am not flooded with them. That's okay, I prefer quality over quantity and most of them seem to be very nice, even if we are not compatible.

8. I know for a fact that there are inactive profiles on there just based on people I know.

Match is just another service. I have had NO luck at all with eharmony and am always surprised when somebody says they met people that way. Nobody I know has ever had actual contact with anybody they met through eharmony.

John: if a woman keeps herself in shape, it’s not unreasonable for her to seek a man with that same value. One of the reasons why active, attractive women in their 40's (like me) are now attracted to 30 year olds (not in their 20’s since that would be creepy! Like some of you, most of us aren’t quite there yet) is because they want someone who still cares about the way they look; its hard to find single men in their 40's that stay active so that they have control of their weight (not to mention “other” common issues related to many men in their 40’s) I think if men cared more about what it takes to stay attractive to a woman (and vice-versa of course) then you would not see so many women now attracted to younger men. Its time for men to start being concerned about what a woman needs so she can stay attracted to her mate. It seems a lot of men put their needs (which are based on a stereotype long gone!) first.

Yes John, my response is almost identical to yours. Is that not ok with you? If it isn’t, then this is a social problem that needs to be evaluated. Simply, my attitude may not work for most "middle aged" men because they want to continue living in a world were the “double standard” benefits (and has always benefited) them.

Kate: if a man keeps himself in shape, its not unreasonable for him to seek a women with that same value. One of the reasons why active men in their 40's (like me) chase after 20-30 year old's (I don't) is because they want someone who still cares about the way they look; its hard to find single women in their 40's that stay active so that they have control of their weight. I think if women cared more about what it takes to stay attractive to a man (and vice-versa of course) then you would not see so many men chasing after younger women. Its time for women to start being concerned about what a man needs to stay attracted to his mate. It seems a lot of women put his needs secondary to other things that she needs to do; which should not be done.

This is in repsonse to Kate in Vancouver. Hey sorry your so bitter that a men your age want younger women. One stupid action doesn't justify another stupid action, but I guess it is an eye for eye with you because you have been burned too.

I can keep this short and sweet, being "threatened" about keeping up with the times is not the issue. Saying that people have unrealistic expectations was simply stating the facts. No, I don't feel threatened because I have gotten dates with many attractive women, and I am very attractive. That is not the issue. There are some people, both men and women on this site that must be expecting, a human genetic experiment in perfect symmetry.

So you are right, times are changing, but no it is not too bad. I stay in shape, take care of my looks, and I want someone who does the same. But I don't expect someone to be perfect just take them out and see what they are like. And just because THIS country is creating ridiculous standards, doesn't mean there aren't plenty of people like me, who still live in the real world, and will find love the old fashioned way.

Good luck with keeping up with the 20 year olds.

I am a 40 yo asian woman with a reasonably attractive face and fantastic body, cool personality (really- not wild, not mousy just a cool open minded wholesome normal girl), post-doc education and six figure income who has no kids or substance abuse problem. I would say match isn't that great but it's better than any of the other one I tried namely eharmony. And even on match, I don't get that many great men. 9/10 men who write either look awful, don't have as much education, have too many children or too much extra weight. I wonder is it b/c of my age, my ethnicity, or what. Now I have a free membership on chemistry.com which is a offshoot of match. it doesn't hurt.

This resonse is for Mr. Happy

Mr Happy said the following..... "This is EXACTLY what is wrong with America today. Television, women’s tabloids, and a false image of the perfect male………coupled with inflated egos and delusions of grandeur have fueled a search for the perfect male because the females are already so perfect, obviously. I guess no one on here has been in a real relationship. Because ego-maniacs don’t have long lasting relationships, because they can never be satisfied".

To him I say....welcome to the real world Mr. Happy. Try being a woman in her forties on any dating site (match.com included), trying to attract a man her age only to find out that countless middle aged men chase twenty something girls with skinny waists and belly tops.

Welcome to the present. How does it feel to have to live up to expectations and standards -- a world where women are looking for younger men, more fit men, more accomplished men, more attractive men, and more confident men. Haven't you men been chasing an illusion too for hundreds of years? You're calling women "Egomaniacs"? It's hilarious that you're complaining and feel threatend because it's "your turn" to MEASURE UP to illusions set up by the media? HA! What a joke! Welcome to the feelings of insecurity women have experienced for hundreds of years.

Media standards are beginning to affect both genders. This fact plays a huge role in the choices "both" men and women make on dating sites and in the real world. Times are a changin'! Too bad.