Reviews of Match.com

I went on Match becuase I live in a rural area outside of LA, where meeting women is impossible. Im considered good looking, good job, house, in shape and all that. Never married no kids. In the first month I went out on about 10 different dates. So it did work for me as far as getting to meet women. However, I had chemistry with only one of them. We still talk and e-mail, but have not seen each other again.

Most of them that I went on a first date with, I would not even give a second look at if I crossed paths with them in the real world (or a first look for that matter). I think these ordinary women get such a huge ego boost from all the attention they get that they think their Jessica Alba all of a sudden. Then they start making up unrealistic expectations, and/or they are onto someone more interesting to them. Alot of them are divorced and have kids, and they are being real picky. Most guys would not want to raise some other dudes kids. Especially if she's just a plain ole Jane. But the rules of the real world do not apply to the internet dating world.

What really rankled me is that you would think that you hit it off on the date, and then your e-mails and phone calls are ignored after. Not Mathes fault, just the nature of the people who are on it. It can mess with your self confidence. The big mistake I made was doing the wining and dining thing, and spending gobs of money. Meet for coffee or a cocktail first. Something less than $10. They all sound real nice and upbeat on the phone and e-mail. Then when you meet in person, it's like talking to a toad.

The scam artists are really easy to spot. They generally wink at you first, and never check out your profile. Then they have the most generic cliche profiles. They like the beach and go all the time, but they live in Iowa. Had one from Vegas and no mention of a favorite eatery or casino. If they e-mail, they immediatley want you to contact them on their Yahoo account.

I've learned that the profiles on Match are probably closer to who they would like to be as a person, not who they really are. I just skim them now. 90% of them say the same thing (I like the beach, the outdoors, quiet cozy evenings cuddling up, and blah blah blah). My subscription runs out in a month and a half. I'm not gonna take anyone else to seriously on it, or go out of my way to meet someone unless, on the off chance that they really knock my socks off.

My suggestion is to save your money. Learn how to interact with the opposite sex in the real world. The 10 dates I went on, I consider as training for the real world. If you have to try it, do it for only a month. You'll know by then if it's going to work for you.

Well its tough to say that match doesn't work.. Over the years I have had kinda bad success with crazy people on it.. but that is what you get.. Its my boundaries that were broken and I'm responsible for that.

My only concern is that most woman are in La La land..with expectations.. I actually met and married a beautiful woman..who basically is a good person... until I let her run me over to the alter.. I gotta just say that the woman are there.. and they do respond physically.. as a first impression..of course.. and after that you gotta be you.. and stick to what you believe in.. thats it.. its a source.. not a solution.. Craig

First of all, I would like to thank all the guys who have posted a review of Match on this board. Until now, I honestly thought I was the only guy having trouble.

I have been on Match three times over the last two years, for a combined total of nine months. During the last two 90 day trials, I have kept a logue of all members I contacted (username), along with a checkmark if she wrote back, two checkmarks if I got her phone number, and three checkmarks if we ended up meeting in person.

Here are my results for the the first trial (Dec '07 to Mar '08): Total emails sent: 192 emails, Positive responses: 9 (1 in 21.3 response rate), Rejection letters: 7. Of those 9, only two progressed to dates. One of those lasted about two months, while the other was just a single first date. Both girls were very attractive though.

Results for the second trial (Mar '08 to Jul '08): Total emails sent: 214 emails, Positive responses: 23 (1 in 9.3 response rate), Rejection letters: 15. Of those 23, most didn't make it past the first email, and only 2 resulted in meeting in person (again, both were attractive to me, and looked better than their pics). Positive responses are emails in which she writes back showing interest. These do not include the "thanks, but..." rejection letters that several girls have sent me.

I'm actually not a bad looking guy. I'm 5'7", 137 lbs, 31, jet black hair, brown eyes, dark skin, physically fit, great conversationalist, and people refer to me as "outgoing", charming, and intelligent. My profile has drawn much praise, and every email I have written was original and custom crafted for the particular woman I was writing to (all girls are different, and respond to different approaches). So you can imagine how time consuming and mentally exhausting it is to write over 400 custom emails over the 180 day period!

The funny thing is, girls don't seem to have a problem talking to me and being with me in real life (even tall slender blondes!), which proves that I'm a pretty decent guy in real life. But on Match, most of the girls don't want to be bothered. I decided to try online dating because I figured it would be more "efficient" than hustling girls at parties and public places.

Here are my conclusions: It's not entirely the women's fault. They are outnumbered, a lot of them can't write back because they aren't paid subscribers, and most don't have the time because they are bombarded with emails from guys (including guys who don't come close to meeting their requirements). At least I tried, so I can say I gave it my honest best. If Match was free, I might try again later. But meeting only 4 girls in person, after sending over 400 emails, is a very poor rate of return (1%), especially when compared to real life.

Thanks again to all the guys who posted on this board and shared your stories, and I wish all of you the best of luck in your search.

Match.com isn't interested in finding matches for their customers, only getting the money upfront and not refunding it when the customer is dissatisfied. I joined for 6 mos and after one month, had enough. The matches sent did not match my requirements (did not want children nor date anyone who had children living at home). They sent me matches from out of state (what reality is there is establishing a meaningful relationship that lives across the country? I sent out lots of winks and emails to guys and no response. Those that wrote reviews about women being vain didn't have my experience with these cocky, self-centered males I apparently tried to make contact with. No one had the courtesy of responding, even to say "no thanks." This whole thing has soured me for online dating. I was an EHarmony customer about five years ago and the experience was about what Match.com was. I wouldn't even rate Match.com with 1 star but that was my lowest choice. Match.com sent me a match where the guy was total disfigured in his face and kept emailing me even after I told him I wasn't interested. Then there were those few guys that once I sent them a light email, they came back with all kinds of platitudes about love and the meaning of it and how this and that. A little strong for the first email. Warning to those considering Match.com - STAY AWAY!

**** Stars? It's crazy I know. Off and on for a few months. Many of what I have read made me sad. It's highly discomforting that so many people are alone, lonely, single, divorced; b they put such a restriction on their dating. I mean, when you meet someone in real life you do not automatically ask if they have kids or if they have been divorced. You go from the imediate attraction then you negotiate with yourself if this person is worth dating. I had too many words so I am cutting it short

Yes, there are flakes on this site. This is why I think people should take a long look at themselves before entering the on-line dating scene. People take match literally about finding "the one". The approach of the individual is flawed. People are nervous and scared to take that step to real life interaction, I know I was. With all the stigma attatched to on-line dating I was very trepidacious about the whole experience. But I wanted to try something new, I was never a dater and longed for a platform where I COULD have some control over individuals I let into my life. The experience: So my first contact9by phone). Let me just say that we chatted by email a few times, he winked at me, I was flattered, because unlike many of you that got hundreds, I did not. With all the winks I sent I NEVER recieved a response, oh wait, actually I did but the person kept responding with very short one line/one word phrases, not even full sentences, I politely wished him good luck on his search and moved on. That felt empowering. In real life if he was laim I probaby would be too shy to walk away. Any now back to the story, this person promised to call me in a few days to confirm a meeting and he NEVER did. I was bothered by it but o.k. at the same time, it did not make me think ALL were bad. I was actually glad anyway, in my eyes he was cute but not my typical type. Also let me just say that through this site I have finally focused on what my "type" is. For someone like me, 5 '10' Athletic build, I have Angela Basset arms, and damn proud of it. I love to work out and do athletic things and did not realize till match that this part of my life is important and want someone that had the same ideal. I state my needs very clearly in my profile, I think this is perhaps why I did not get 200 winks a week :-). No games not "playas" But I did not care about quantity, quality was my goal. The second person that I responded to was VERY attractive, I actually paused and wondered why the hell he was winking at me. I wondered why he was winking at some skinny blonde with a way to large boob job from Scottsdale. He made me feel more comfortable stating that he had dated a black woman before and actually prefered women of color. After I got past the hot factor I realized that we had a lot in common, down to our groomng habbits, which I found was a red flag to begin with. We FINALLY met and it was great fun, he was easy to talk to, made me laugh out loud and he appeared sweet. The first date was so much fun, but after that it got straaange. He immediately spoke of marriage, it scared the you know what out of me, I would only laugh at him, thiking he was joking. We met at his house on the second date, I felt a little hesitant about this but when I got there I felt fine so I stayed. I ended up staying over, not sex, we kissed good night, but that was it. We talked for most of the night, which distorted the whole picture of what we were to each other, at least on my end. After the second night he would text me little notes and such I thought that was cute but as time went by I became sick of the notes, I would respond back but then would take FOREVER to respond back. I found this unsettling and started to sence the "game" I made the mistake of showing up late one night and he was PISSED, I was busy and he send some very angry texts, when I got there was in a huff about me being late, he was so angry he started interogating my about still being on match and what I wanted, (insecure) and he proposed marriage to me. WEIRD It ended with me being very annoyed at his childisness and the fact that he only wanted to communicate in text, and was flaky about us hanging out, not regard for my needs or feelings. It was about a week before his birthday when I said that he was mediocre in how he treated me and I needed to see other people to stay grounded; after our battle of the angry texts, he texts me again at 2 in the morning, saying he could not sleep and I should come over; I had turned my phone off and only saw it late the next day. I told him clearly he did not mean that for me, he never responded, on his birthday I send him a happy birthday text, I felt bad, I do not know why. But I went on match and got rid of his profile. Good riddance.

After all that I do not blame the poor guy, he is just some guy that (a) wants to get laid and (b) propbably lonely. I decided not to blame match for the failure. After all did I really think that he could be my prince charming and dream come truee. Nah. So I decided to take a long hard look at myself and I realized that all the red flags this guy put up I ignored because I wanted a fairy tale. So I went back on match with one goal, just have fun. I would reach out to men I found interesting, and not take it to heart if they did not respond.. Let me just say that I am one of the ones that do respond, good bad or indifferent I send a kind note. People hat feeling ignored. I decided that if I met anyone I would take it slow and follow my heart. Be specific about what I wanted. I would be realistic and honest with myself as well. So far it has worked....I met a great man we have been seeing each other for about a month. We have agreed to take it easy, establish a friendship first then move into something romantic if those feelings are there. I do not know if he is the one, but thus far I know I have gained a great friend.

I also have sent countless emails and winks for about a week with little or no response. Im an average or a little better looking guy, or so I thought, but this site has sent my confidence to lows Ive never known. I agree as well that there are phony profiles on there that suddenly disappear. Guys if you join, check your ego before you sign in.

What a lame-ass site. My ex-girl at the time, (I've since crawled my sorry ass back to her) would put most of these chicks to shame in the looks department. And she puts ALL of them to shame personality-wise. How humiliating it was to be treated like a second rate citizen by some bitch that you wouldn't even give a first, much less second, look in the "real world". Who can blame them? They're getting attention they otherwise wouldn't get within sniffing distance of. They're tired of guys who "play games". My ass...they sure play the game well. If I ever see another "I'm equally comfortable in jeans or evening gown", "I love to laugh", or any of the other cliche bullshit, I'll put a pistol to my head. If you're considering blowing your money on this shit...DON'T. Go back to your girlfriend or join a monastery. You'll be glad you did.

The women on Match.com have really high expectations, to put it nicely. If you're not 6'3", you don't have Brad Pitt's looks, and make over $100K, you're SOL. The women's profiles are outrageous. How the hell do they afford all this snow skiing, scuba diving, and hang gliding? I went on one date with a woman who staed she had "average" body type on her profile. God only knows how old that picture on her profile was, because I didn't recognize her when she walked up. "A few extra pounds" wouldn't have done this girl justice. My ex-girlfriend at the time, who I've since crawled back to, would put any of those women to shame looks-wise, without the stuck-up attitude. What a waste of time and money. Can I give a 0 star rating?

I gave match.com one last try, and it still sucks. A lot of guys here are complaining about the lack of responses - this is an inherent flaw in their system. Non- paying members cannot read emails, nor do they even know who sent them an email. They only know that someone sent them an email, which is useless. Why should a woman shell out $40 in order to read an email which may have come from someone she has no interest in? So she abandons her profile after only a few weeks rather than join, with letters from a LOT of guys left unanswered, to be auto- deleted after 30 days . Guys send out 100 letters, get no responses, so they start flooding their search results with winks or form letters - both equally insulting to a woman. No, the whole set up on match.com is pathetic. Dismal. At least on yahoo, if you send a woman a letter, she can read it and see your profile, then decide if she wants to sign up and reply. This seems fair to me. Match.com = not fair. Actually, it sucks.

A WARNING TO MEN THINKING OF MATCH.COM

I had lots of success with EHarmony a few years ago. After terminating a 1.5 year relationship, I decided to give Match a try. There were lots of nice profiles of attractive women. I signed up for 6 months and completed a thoughtful profle. Within two nights I began to talk and meet a few nice ladies. My experience was great until I got a notice abruptly cancelling my Match membership.

A friend at work told me they abruptly dropped him. They gave him and myseld no reason. If I wanted to inquire about the reason I was told that I'd have to subpeaona Match.com and file a law suit in Delaware. How many people follow through with that?

Come to find out, my ex girlfriend (who is insanely geleous) filed a false complaint so I'd get kicked off of Match. It worked.

Match does not care to investigate and there is NO recourse. So if you are thinking of joining Match, don't. You may want to consider trying EHarmony instead.

Oh, yes. Don't mention to your ex that you joined Match.