I was on and off eharmony for five years--probably more "off" than "on" (I've tried other dating services and had a two-year relationship somewhere in there) but eharmony consistently amazes me for its awfulness.

In my five years using eharmony, I seriously had one date. On other websites--match, for instance, or chemistry--I usually had at least one date per month. Why is eharmony so terrible? I don't know, but it's hard as hell to get people through that dumb question-and-answer phase, and then get them to the actual meet-and-greet level. I think most of the guys who sign up for this service are sort of shy, fat, and nerdy, so they're content to drag things on forever and ever through email. They just want a pen pal.

Moreover, there are way too many inactive profiles. You can request to communicate with people all you want, but I'd say that 80% will never receive your request because they haven't logged on in 18 months.

Eharmony also doesn't allow you a lot of freedom with your profile. The main question is "What are you most passionate about?" Most guys answer this question pretty concisely: "Sports." Yawn. "What are you looking for in a partner?" "Honesty." "Who's the most important person in your life?" "My brother." And on and on.

The only thing that was good about eharmony was its relative privacy. Match and Yahoo are so public. But the downside is that you have to wait around for eharmony to deliver what they consider to be a suitable match (and God knows how they make these decisions). I think that all online dating sites are problematic and probably a scam, but others allow you more freedom to write about yourself and to pursue matches you find interesting and worthwhile. Eharmony has sent me some weirdos. That's the other thing--I'm pretty open-minded to all kinds of people, but the matches you get on eharmony seem extremely socially awkward. All I have to say: ugh.