Where to start........ Well, I've been on and off for 2 years now.

I'm in that "funny" age of dating. I started on Jdate when I was 39 and now I'm 41.

Most of the men who contact me are looking for 1 of 3 things:

1. a dominant women to beat them into submission while I humiliate them (NOT into this)

2. a cougar (NOT INTO THIS either and I have it specified in my ID and profile)

3. A young piece of eye candy for a 50 - 78 year old man. (TOTALLY NOT INTO THIS and I have it specified in my id and profile)

Dated 2 men (both with severe issues - 2nd one ended up being gay)

Met a 3rd for drinks. His profile (and pics) were of a VERY attractive, good looking man who claimed to be 37. When I met him, my first question was "how is it possible that I'm older than you?" - as he was clearly in his 50's.

Outside of that, MOST of the matches they have me as being compatible with are Nigerian scammers with fake profiles.

Example profile: (content is always the same and pics are from various catalogs)

"I am a calm, intelligent, financially stable and faithful man.I'm an straight forward, honest, passionate and very romantic man with a great heart and Great personality. I wear my heart upon my shoulder. I'm a Man that has been brought up with good manners. I like to be spontaneous. I'm not boring at all. I'm not into games at all. I love the outdoors and animals a lot. I love holding hands, hugging and cuddling up with that special someone I can share my love with and be loved in return. I believe in communicating with my love. I love to be romantic in fun little ways when you least expect it.I have a simple philosophy, which is to follow the “golden rule” which is “treat everyone like you want them to treat you”, and show love and understanding to all human beings. I just try to follow the golden rule, and think positive! I also like to live in the moment, and enjoy life everyday. I am self-confident, and know that I can accomplish any thing I focus my attention on. “As a man thinks so he is!!!” I completely believe this, statement that is why I always try to be positive and think good thoughts. I never lie, so if you ask me a question you will get an honest answer. I always believe in doing the right thing, and never hurt anyone or thing. I am a man of strong character but get along with all people. I have a broad range of humor."

Currently, 7 of my matches have this same profile and all live in East Orange, NJ......nuf said.

I get literally harassed from 63 year old men who start up IM's with "I've been told I look 45" - even though my profile states that I can guarantee I won't have one ounce of interest.

On that same note, I get bombarded with IM's from 19 - 23 year old kids looking to screw an old lady that looks hot.

There is absolutely NO WAY to control this as there are no settings. Unfortunately, I DO come up as a good match in their search based on some really vague and quite silly search criteria.

Yes I agree with what someone else said on this message board. Jdate is the dumpster of dating. These are all the non-datable people - come back in 2 years, and these folks will still be here - with the same pics.