SUBJECT: The problem not getting responses with Lavelife is the inability, or lack of effort from the site, to attract women.

I have experienced many of the same things people here have mentioned. For example getting no response (similes and messages) and having women disappear while knowing that I'm a decent looking guy, have a decent profile, and have not done anything wrong.

Just think of lavalife being a night club. Often clubs have an event like "ladies night" or specials like "Ladies drink free" in order to attract girls. Why for girls and not for men? Because where there are girls the guys want to go. And what do guys do when they get in a club? They buy drinks. A lot for themselves and some for the women there.

Well if we think of lavalife like a club and except for drinks we instead have credits. Now let’s face it, in this society men are generally expected to make the first move. And by this reasoning we would expect them to buy the bulk, but not all, of the credits. Just like in clubs they buy the bulk, but not all, of the drinks. But herein lies the problem, unlike a club where a guy can walk in and see that there are a way more men than women and simply leave, it is not readily apparent at lavalife that there are way more men than women on the site. (Just do a quick google search on men to women ratios on dating sites)

So the moral of the story is that to get girls to use your dating service (or visit your club) you have to do something to attract them. Guys usually search for women and women often try their best to attract guys (Just think - why do women take way longer to get ready than men??). So guys are going to go on lavalife as an extension of their search for women. Women won't search the sites they have to be enticed too. So with the above reasoning my theory as to why we not getting responses is simply:

- The Law of Supply and Demand.

Simply put there are more men on lavalife so women can be much more choosy.

But the reasoning does not stop here. (Please take note that the following are just theories of mine and may or may not be true) Now couple the supply and demand with other factors like:

1. Some women joined the site out of curiosity and never really would want to meet someone over the internet.

2. There are probably a few who are really crazy and just screwing around with fake profiles (not company created) to see how many responses they can get.

3. There are probably girls who like the attention they get from the site but don't really want to meet anyone there.

4. In all probability there exist a higher proportion of women online, especially the attractive ones, who have really high standards and unrealistic expectations so they will not respond to someone unless they are absolutely perfect.

5. Maybe some women are online because they are pissed off with men. They may have been hurt recently and now be in an "all guys are jerks stage" and therefore not receptive to men. They are looking for reason to reject rather than to accept guys who contact them.

6. And finally, some girls just don't like your profile or the way you look.

So add up all the above reasons and it is easy to see why so few responses are received.

So why does lavalife, or any other dating site for that matter, just simply make efforts to attract more women? Simple, Money. The more women that guys have to contact the more credits they spend. And then it gets like a casino mentality, oh I got a response from that girl but she is not receptive. So maybe the next six credits will be the real women I'm looking for. A lot of these sites are built on great marketing schemes and, what I assume to be, cheap overseas labor. Not quality services.

Not to be all negative I have met some nice women in person on Lavalife but not nearly what the marketing campaign promises. So this fall I think I'll try volunteering and maybe join a club or two. At least if I don't meet someone then I'll be helping someone in need and won't spend any hard earned dollars for a poor quality service.

So in the mean time for all you singles out there best of luck in your search for that special girl or guy. If you're on Lavalife you'll need it.